is it just me?

I thought I would be nice to those kids. Sneaky little bastards.

So, I am innocently walking through library mall today. This is an open area where in the summer they have food carts. It's a nice little gathering place in the center of campus. I first see a guy reading the bible to no one in particular. This is not uncommon on library mall, and some people even use a pulpit-type thing that was built in the 60s in the days of marches, protests, etc to preach to the unsuspecting masses. Then this little cub scout looking kid says "Excuse me, would you be willing to take a face survey? It only takes two minutes." "I'm sorry, what kind of survey?" "A faith survey." Um...I guess. I am quite reluctant but these kids are like 11 years old and it's about a billion degrees outside and no one is talking to them. I am kind of creeped out that they are Jesus scouts, not cub scouts, but whatever. They said it would be quick. Here's what happened.

Jesus Scout (JS): What religion are you?
Me: Episcopalian. (This is only true on lineage, as I was never baptized and do not regularly attend church. But I thought these kids might freak out if I said none.)
JS: What is God to you?
Me: Excuse me?
JS: What is God to you? You know, creator, all powerful, stuff like that. (keep in mind, this kid is 11.)

Holy shit. Helping these kids out was a BIG mistake. My question is: do MOST people have a quick response to that kind of question? When I think of surveys I think of "how many times a week do you go to the grocery store?" or "how many times in the last 6 months have you ordered something online?" This question sort of gets to your fundamental beliefs about the universe. This is not what I had bargained for. I consider saying, you know what you little freaks? I am not taking your survey. Instead I plan to go straight to hell, and I am taking your moms with me. But I am a nicer person than that. And I have to admit, there was an element of curiousity. I mean, what could possibly be the follow up question to that? What do you feel is your purpose on this Earth?

But first I am sure you are wondering how I answered that question. In the end, I didn't. I said "I don't really know the answer to that question." Next.

JS: Do you feel that you know God? Well...I guess not.
Me: Nope (feeling a little weird since now this kid is getting judgemental. I mean, it is correct that if you don't know what God is to you you probably don't feel that you know him, but it was still weird.)
JS: Do you believe in the after-life?
Me: Sure
JS: Do you believe that we are judged in the after-life for the way we lived our life on Earth?

Okay, now I am starting to panic. My hands are sweating. There's now three little scouts: one asking, one writing the answers and another one just hanging around. Here I am, a grown woman talking to three boys I have never met about god and the afterlife. I can't make eye contact with them. I am wondering how many questions there are. I start wondering who the sickos are that sent these kids out to do their "faith survey". I feel sure they got yelled at at least once, and I bet a lot more people bailed in the middle of the survey. These are serious questions that are not easy to answer for anyone, I would imagine, but certainly not for me.

I was already feeling suspicious when the real issue came out:
JS: How do you feel about gay marriage?

Aha. I should have known. I mean, I did know. The good news is that question is so much easier for me than the other ones. I am fully in favor of allowing gay marriage.

JS: How do you feel about abortion and stem cell research?

Nice question, kid. I love how those two things have become the same. But again, easy for me. Pro-choice, pro stem-cell research.

I can't remember if there were any more questions. At this point I was so traumatized that I was starting to lose my appetite. At some point they said. Okay, thank you. And I just left. FOrtunately they have the good sense not to ask for any personal details, but I still think it was quite irresponsible to send these kids out on the street to ask these sorts of questions. These are things people fight about. They make people feel very upset. Though, maybe that's why they used the kids, since they thought no one would beat them up or anything. Who the hell knows. In any case, it was freaky and I didn't like it. Not one bit.